Should I date women before I’m fully recovered from erection problems?

Should you wait until your erection problems are fixed before you go out to meet women? This article talks about that and gives you a surprising answer.

Warning: there are images of scantily clad women here. If you are avoiding triggers (as I do) then defocus your eyes and skip over them. Got it?

Okay so let’s begin…

Ben had ED for about 10 years, since he was 23. Now at 33, we chatted and I asked him about his plans to meet women.

“No way,” he said, “I’m gonna wait until I’m fully recovered from the ED before I try that.”

Why not?

“I don’t want to have another failure. So I’ll wait until I’m really recovered.”

I told Ben that this is a mistake.

And I thought I’d tell you at the same time, as maybe you have thought about that and are waiting and maybe you’ll find this helpful too.

Sure, I understand: The idea of waiting until you’re “ready” has appeal.

You can see the path in your mind’s eye. You’ll do the solo activities in my courses (Raging Sexual Confidence, or Big Bang) and you’ll begin recovering and then when you are getting and keeping good erections, you’ll go out on the town and meet girls.

Most of all, you

Avoid the cycle of failure

 The cycle starts with the discovery, “hey my dick isn’t hard” and proceeds to testing, and trying, and failing. And then her “oh it’s okay, no problem” when you know it IS a problem, and perhaps a woman who isn’t as kind and acts and shows her disappointment.

Courtesy Of www.flickr.com/photos/mukhina/3840364331/

Courtesy Of www.flickr.com/photos/mukhina/3840364331/

Then the cycle of failure turns naturally into anxiety. Anxiety about whether you will or you won’t, and whether it will or it won’t…and then you have full blown performance anxiety.

The erection problems started, then the performance anxiety followed. Remember that. If you can get the performance back, the anxiety will naturally get better.

Okay, so

Should you wait until you are ready?

 I’ve watched thousands of guys come and go and try to get their desensitization fixed. (Don’t know that desensitization causes erection problems? Read here for how and why.)

And the guys who succeed are more often the guys who get some female attention sooner rather than later.

I mean, first of all, think about it. If you have gotten desensitized, you are probably not having a lot of action with a female in the first place. So avoiding women will certainly not fix that any time soon, right?

But more than that, there is the

Physiological reason for quicker and better recovery when you are meeting women

Our brains are wired for interaction with real women. When we get desensitized it can be from porn, poor masturbation habits, health problems, or often a combination.

Remember that desensitization is a real physiological problem. It isn’t “all in your head”. And the fix isn’t in your head either.

When you interact with real women, you begin getting your sensitivity to real women back. It’s a start. The more you interact, the more your brain churns out hormones such as oxytocin that make you feel good, secure, and also improve your erections including both the duration and the time between ejaculations (shortening it.)

 

And when you interact with real women you are satisfying the deepest needs we have in our reptile brains for companionship. That is tremendously rewarding. However often 

It doesn’t feel rewarding at first to get out there and meet real women

If you’ve been using porn, then real women will seem kind of boring. Or if a girl seems hot, you’ll see her in your mind’s eye in a porn scene of some kind. It takes awhile for that type of fantasy to fade away, but it does. And a good thing, because as long as you’re experiencing those types of fantasies often, you probably aren’t recovered yet.

brunette with cleavage small

And sex can seem flat, boring and uninteresting. That is, sex with a real woman as opposed to the three nymphettes spanking each other and….in those porn scenes…you get the idea…

It takes time to recover, and the more you spend time with real women, the quicker you will recover. And some guys don’t recover without this at all. It is essential for them, and maybe fore you.

So now I hear you ask, 

But what if she wants to have sex with me and I’m not ready yet for sex?

I know you don’t want to have another failure.

So here’s what you need to do. You need to take it slow. Spend some time in bed sleeping spooned together for a time or three, with sex off the table.

Can’t do this? Well keep trying. Show some masculine resolve. Some decisive goal-oriented behavior us guys are known for. Say “I am getting over some erection issues and the next few dates I want to sleep together and not have sex.”

Oh, what a sin that is! It so goes against today’s “hop into bed and fuck” culture, doesn’t it?

And what is she laughs in my face and says, “you’re kidding, I’m a horny girl and I’m interested in a guy pounding me with his salami good and hard and right now and if it’s not you I’m gonna find another guy.”

Well then, I say, Sayonara. Good knowing you. Next! They aren’t all going to like this.

And then you meet the girl who loves the idea…and loves you for being so confident…

But what of the girl who does like the idea?

“No guy has told me THAT before. Wow, you are honest, and confident to be so sure of yourself that you can tell me THAT.” She looks at you and feels a little weak and a little wet. You are HOT.

You’ll have a much better chance of a fantastic relationship when your woman is okay with this. And the sex will be much better when you have worked up each of your Oxytocin levels.

You certainly can do this “sleep together first” thing for the rest of your life, after you’ve recovered. It makes everything SO much better.  But…

…now don’t go and ruin it by trying to stick it in when you were the one who said, “let’s do it this way instead.”

So you sleep with her a few times, maybe give her a bit of oral (or not), and you will notice something very interesting and exciting.

You will notice that semis start coming back…morning wood sometimes (hey it’s been ages since that happened!). Maybe you get kind of excited when you see her and your dick gets hard just from looking into her eyes. Ain’t that a trip?

real girls are more fun when you avoid porn and don't get erectile dysfunction

And then…when you get semis and morning wood…you won’t have to worry about failing.

Meanwhile you can do “intercourse anywhere” entry while still soft and you can hang out in her vagina. Spend 30 minutes or two hours connected that way. How wonderful is that?

Because it’s THIS that heals the brain and leads to true recovery.

You’ve done the solo activities, helpful as those are…and now

It’s time to get out there and meet women

Throw away your fears and doubts. And get out there.

Are you ready? You’re not? Then now is the time to start. Either way, it’s time. And if you want to know where to start, then rely upon Factor X:  register for this free web training on how to meet a woman as soon as this weekend using Factor X to do the work practically for you.

And please leave a comment or question that I can answer, or we can talk about.

warmly

 matt cook signature white background

 

 

Should I date women before I’m fully recovered from erection problems?

Should you wait until your erection problems are fixed before you go out to meet women? This article talks about that and gives you a surprising answer.

Warning: there are images of scantily clad women here. If you are avoiding triggers (as I do) then defocus your eyes and skip over them. Got it?

Okay so let’s begin…

Ben had ED for about 10 years, since he was 23. Now at 33, we chatted and I asked him about his plans to meet women.

“No way,” he said, “I’m gonna wait until I’m fully recovered from the ED before I try that.”

Why not?

“I don’t want to have another failure. So I’ll wait until I’m really recovered.”

I told Ben that this is a mistake.

And I thought I’d tell you at the same time, as maybe you have thought about that and are waiting and maybe you’ll find this helpful too.

Sure, I understand: The idea of waiting until you’re “ready” has appeal.

You can see the path in your mind’s eye. You’ll do the solo activities in my courses (Raging Sexual Confidence, or Big Bang) and you’ll begin recovering and then when you are getting and keeping good erections, you’ll go out on the town and meet girls.

Most of all, you

Avoid the cycle of failure

 The cycle starts with the discovery, “hey my dick isn’t hard” and proceeds to testing, and trying, and failing. And then her “oh it’s okay, no problem” when you know it IS a problem, and perhaps a woman who isn’t as kind and acts and shows her disappointment.

Courtesy Of www.flickr.com/photos/mukhina/3840364331/

Courtesy Of www.flickr.com/photos/mukhina/3840364331/

Then the cycle of failure turns naturally into anxiety. Anxiety about whether you will or you won’t, and whether it will or it won’t…and then you have full blown performance anxiety.

The erection problems started, then the performance anxiety followed. Remember that. If you can get the performance back, the anxiety will naturally get better.

Okay, so

Should you wait until you are ready?

 I’ve watched thousands of guys come and go and try to get their desensitization fixed. (Don’t know that desensitization causes erection problems? Read here for how and why.)

And the guys who succeed are more often the guys who get some female attention sooner rather than later.

I mean, first of all, think about it. If you have gotten desensitized, you are probably not having a lot of action with a female in the first place. So avoiding women will certainly not fix that any time soon, right?

But more than that, there is the

Physiological reason for quicker and better recovery when you are meeting women

Our brains are wired for interaction with real women. When we get desensitized it can be from porn, poor masturbation habits, health problems, or often a combination.

Remember that desensitization is a real physiological problem. It isn’t “all in your head”. And the fix isn’t in your head either.

When you interact with real women, you begin getting your sensitivity to real women back. It’s a start. The more you interact, the more your brain churns out hormones such as oxytocin that make you feel good, secure, and also improve your erections including both the duration and the time between ejaculations (shortening it.)

blonde girl let's meet women

And when you interact with real women you are satisfying the deepest needs we have in our reptile brains for companionship. That is tremendously rewarding. However often 

It doesn’t feel rewarding at first to get out there and meet real women

If you’ve been using porn, then real women will seem kind of boring. Or if a girl seems hot, you’ll see her in your mind’s eye in a porn scene of some kind. It takes awhile for that type of fantasy to fade away, but it does. And a good thing, because as long as you’re experiencing those types of fantasies often, you probably aren’t recovered yet.

brunette with cleavage small

And sex can seem flat, boring and uninteresting. That is, sex with a real woman as opposed to the three nymphettes spanking each other and….in those porn scenes…you get the idea…

It takes time to recover, and the more you spend time with real women, the quicker you will recover. And some guys don’t recover without this at all. It is essential for them, and maybe fore you.

So now I hear you ask, 

But what if she wants to have sex with me and I’m not ready yet for sex?

I know you don’t want to have another failure.

So here’s what you need to do. You need to take it slow. Spend some time in bed sleeping spooned together for a time or three, with sex off the table.

Can’t do this? Well keep trying. Show some masculine resolve. Some decisive goal-oriented behavior us guys are known for. Say “I am getting over some erection issues and the next few dates I want to sleep together and not have sex.”

Oh, what a sin that is! It so goes against today’s “hop into bed and fuck” culture, doesn’t it?

And what is she laughs in my face and says, “you’re kidding, I’m a horny girl and I’m interested in a guy pounding me with his salami good and hard and right now and if it’s not you I’m gonna find another guy.”

Well then, I say, Sayonara. Good knowing you. Next! They aren’t all going to like this.

And then you meet the girl who loves the idea…and loves you for being so confident…

But what of the girl who does like the idea?

“No guy has told me THAT before. Wow, you are honest, and confident to be so sure of yourself that you can tell me THAT.” She looks at you and feels a little weak and a little wet. You are HOT.

You’ll have a much better chance of a fantastic relationship when your woman is okay with this. And the sex will be much better when you have worked up each of your Oxytocin levels.

You certainly can do this “sleep together first” thing for the rest of your life, after you’ve recovered. It makes everything SO much better.  But…

…now don’t go and ruin it by trying to stick it in when you were the one who said, “let’s do it this way instead.”

So you sleep with her a few times, maybe give her a bit of oral (or not), and you will notice something very interesting and exciting.

You will notice that semis start coming back…morning wood sometimes (hey it’s been ages since that happened!). Maybe you get kind of excited when you see her and your dick gets hard just from looking into her eyes. Ain’t that a trip?

real girls are more fun when you avoid porn and don't get erectile dysfunction

And then…when you get semis and morning wood…you won’t have to worry about failing.

Meanwhile you can do “intercourse anywhere” entry while still soft and you can hang out in her vagina. Spend 30 minutes or two hours connected that way. How wonderful is that?

Because it’s THIS that heals the brain and leads to true recovery.

You’ve done the solo activities, helpful as those are…and now

It’s time to get out there and meet women

Throw away your fears and doubts. And get out there.

Are you ready? You’re not? Then now is the time to start. Either way, it’s time. And if you want to know where to start, then rely upon Factor X:  register for this free web training on how to meet a woman as soon as this weekend using Factor X to do the work practically for you.

And please leave a comment or question that I can answer, or we can talk about.

warmly

 matt cook signature white background

 

 

Should you masturbate and fantasize about your girlfriend?

Gary asked me recently, “Matt, I keep a photo of my girlfriend in my wallet. Sometimes I think about her and fantasize. Sometimes I take out her photo and put it in front of me, like at the gym while I’m doing my spinning exercise. Is this bad? Will this set me back in my recovery into fantastic sex that I want?”

In this article I want to answer this question posed by Gary.

Gary’s doing pretty well. He’s made big inroads with his testosterone and the programs in my Testosterone Rewind course are helping him fix his diet, his supplement regimen and his lifestyle so his blood sugars are reaching a normal level.

All good.

four pretty black women

But Gary still suffers desensitization.

1. He doesn’t feel that much in his penis.

2. He often has sex with his girlfriend and can’t reach orgasm.

3. He often doesn’t get hard. It’s a crapshoot whether he will or he won’t. And often when he does get hard, the erection suddenly disappears at the worst moment.

These are all symptoms of desensitization.

But in this article we’re talking recovery and how fantasy can stop you from recovering from desensitization. I have mentioned many times that

The reptile brain can’t tell the difference between reality and fantasy

If Gary is wired to fantasy, he will be making his desensitization worse by fantasizing.

Why does fantasy hurt us? And isn’t it perfectly normal to fantasize?

Desensitization is a real, physiological problem. So think of another real physiological problem — I can can eat potato chips or an orange and it’s no big deal. There is a good amount of sugar and starch in these — but for me, it wouldn’t trigger a blood sugar problem.

But if I have had type two diabetes, I should avoid these foods because they will hurt my blood sugars and cause problems.

If you take a guy without desensitization, yeah he can fantasize. But for a guy who is recovering from desensitization, fantasy will hurt his recovery.

That’s because for instance in Gary’s case

Fantasy has wired his brain to respond to fantasy more than to a real woman

The brain kind of works like this: Brain cells fire, a rewarding spurt of dopamine makes the cells go “wow this is GREAT” and then you have feedback loop set up that will tend to want to continue that behavior that resulted in the rewarding dopamine spurt.

Dopamine is part of the brain’s reward circuitry, and the dopamine is what feels good about buying a new car, fucking a beautiful woman, getting a new iPad, or eating another cookie. It’s what makes heroin and cocaine so short-term rewarding.

We need dopamine to get out of bed in the morning. I love my dopamine. It makes me want my woman all the time. I love that.

But when you have become desensitized, your nerve cells fire and you get that dopamine reward from something OTHER than real sex with a real woman.

girlfriend what a pretty girl

And the more often these nerves fire, and the dopamine surges, the more the brain gets carried away from being sensitive to real sex with a real woman. It gets to prefer the rush from porn, or fantasy…

That’s why practically

99% of all men who suffer desensitization need to keep away from fantasy

They need to get the brain cells firing with rewarding dopamine that happens from real sex with real women.

Now, there is such a thing as “good fantasy” and here’s what it is. It’s thinking about your girlfriend or your wife and feeling really good. Really, really good.

I can close my eyes and think of my wife and feel really good. The way I do when I see her in person. 

I don’t fantasize a sex scene with her. I don’t fantasize a porn scene with her. It just feels really good, kind of dreamy. I feel really good.

And that’s how you can tell if a fantasy is bad or good. In general, any fantasy that makes you feel horny, or visualize a sex scene, should be avoided.

Just thinking of your woman and feeling really good — that’s good fantasy.

But for awhile, it may be difficult to have “good fantasy” so you may have to avoid all fantasy

That’s why guys in recovery shouldn’t be masturbating for awhile. The masturbation habits often involve fantasy and porn scenes. Whether the porn scenes are in a guy’s brain or on the computer screen, it’s all the same to the reptile brain.

The reptile brain doesn’t know the difference between fantasy and reality, remember?

 girl looking down at window

Once you recover, you can masturbate generally. Unless it leads you back into porn (if you had a porn habit before.) But for awhile, you need to focus on recovering your sensitivity. And that means, avoiding all fantasy of every kind that leads you down the road to sex scenes and sex fantasies.

After you’ve fully recovered, then the fantasy is delicious and wonderful, so long as it’s the “good” kind, that makes you feel wonderful, and not the “bad” kind, that makes you feel horny

After a sex fantasy, you’ll feel horny for at least 30 minutes. That’s the time it takes for the spurt of sex hormones to subside in your system. So for that period, at least, you’ll be more prone to relapsing to masturbation and porn.

But if you have the “good” fantasy, which is not really a fantasy at all, but more a feeling, then you won’t get a horny feeling and you won’t be visualizing a sex scene. 

How to tell the difference between good and bad fantasy

Bad fantasy:

1. Involves visualizing sex scenes

2. Leads to you feeling horny

3. Leads to you wanting to rub one out

4. Leads you to feeling like you want something you don’t have

Good fantasy:

1. Involves thinking of the person you love

2. Feeling the love you have for her and feeling really good

3. You feel kind of sleepy and wonderful all over

In fact, it’s a great way to get to sleep, to think of her in that way. It makes you feel really great and sets up your sleep for good dreams and waking up really rested.

girlfriend brunette latina

But be careful. Make sure you are ready for this before you try it. For the moment, until your dick is fully back into action and you have your full feeling and sensitivity back, maybe you should steer clear.

And if you are looking for that incredible gorgeous girlfriend, or wanting to get back into the game, register for our exclusive new  Factor X Girlfriend This Weekend web training. You’ll discover how to get a gorgeous girlfriend even if you lack sexual confidence…

warmly

 matt cook signature white background

 

And PLEASE leave a question or comment about your situation, or about what you have discovered. All the guys here in the Brotherhood (only 0.0001% ever comment) will benefit! And I appreciate it as it tells me I’m on the right track and keeps me going, to be honest. Thank you. 

 

 

women want a man who can be a man

I’m so upset that I thought I’d write this article that I’ve put off for a long time.

I’m upset because the tripe and garbage out there about what women “really want” is hurting men and hurting all of us.

So let’s set the record straight. I’ll do it by talking about Ross.

I was helping Ross (a composite student — I paraphrase here for brevity and use composites for convenience) find a girlfriend.

“Ross, are you still using porn?”

Ross said no, he had stopped. “I stopped and found things already started getting better.”

girl in bed

Men like Ross find that when they stop using porn and they stop porn fantasy, they begin looking at women differently. And the women look at them differently.

Women stop and check Ross out. “I had a woman yell ‘you’re hot’ from her car last night, it was cool!” And Ross told me about a waitress recently who “kept touching my shoulder and chatting me up when she didn’t need to. She was really attractive and I knew she wanted me to ask her out.”

Ross discovered the value of discontinuing porn and fantasy. Women are becoming more attracted to him. But now, he needs to undo a lot of what society has conditioned Ross to believe about women.

“What do you mean, Matt?” he asked me when I told him this.

So I thought I’d explain it here.

Let’s start out with the big myth…that  

You have to have money, a good job and good prospects to attract women

I told Ross, this is the worst myth of all.

Women love a guy with money. Of course, why wouldn’t they?

A doctor recently wrote in to me and said, he and his successful friends find women are attracted to them because they have money.

“I tell them that I’m a writer now, Matt,” he said. “That way I can tell if they like me, or are after me because I have money.”

Women can be super attracted to you if you have no money and no prospects. I told this to Ross and I proved it to him.

pretty oriental girl

What attracts women is a man who shows confidence. That’s the start and the end of it. Confidence attracts women. And you don’t need money to have confidence.

In fact, if you have money, you may be more confident because you have it. And women will find you more attractive because you are confident. 

But you can become just as confident even if you are poor and have no job. Guys get women all the time even when they have bad financial prospects, because they are confident guys.

And another myth is that

Women want men who are sensitive, caring, nice…

The attributes that women want in a husband and father include being kind to children, being a good provider, being faithful.

But the attributes that are most attractive to women are masculine, alpha male attributes.

They’re different.

In fact the attributes women say they want in a man are totally different from the attributes women actually want.

You can tell because women fall over themselves for the confident asshole, and leave the nice guy wondering what happened.

This is precisely why they say

Girls like bad boys

And it’s great girls, wonderful girls that are stunningly attractive, horny and faithful…they like “bad boys” too. They can’t help it. 

Because it’s not the bad they’re attracted to. It’s the confidence they’re attracted to. The man who doesn’t give a shit what anyone thinks, who is just himself and looks women in the eye, lets them no what he wants and doesn’t care what they think.

That’s the man the women want.

girl in bed blonde

I told Ross some shortcuts I’ve discovered to being and acting confident without being an asshole. To other men and some women, these behaviors may make Ross seem uncaring, or insensitive. Maybe not nice.

But so what. Before I describe these shortcuts, let me go into the third horrible myth that

Men want sex more than women do, and sex is a way to reward men

Women love, love love sex. And maybe they enjoy it more than men do. They are capable of many orgasms and have more nerve connections for pleasure than men do in their genitals.

The difference with women is that the price of casual sex was much higher for women and biologically women are more wrapped up in the higher biological cost of sex. 

But nowadays, biology is meaningless due to birth control. Social conditioning and biology still impose this massive double standard on men.

But men don’t need to believe in this myth any longer. They can free themselves from it. And they can give women what the women really want.

A woman wants a man to act like a man, a man to overwhelm her with his masculinity and sweep her off her feet.

A man to give her the fucking she craves.

Most of my work is to help someone like Ross find a fantastic girlfriend rather than a chain of one night stands.

But knowing that women want and enjoy sex just as much as men do, and that men don’t need to buy women off in order for the woman to have sex, is very liberating for Ross and probably for all men once they understand this.

It is a key that unlocks the door to a stunning new lifestyle — even if you are “one woman” kind of man.

beautiful woman 

So anyway, Ross put my instructions into practice.

Note that Ross wasn’t actually more confident because of what I told him to do. But he was able to act more confident.

Women get wet and respond sexually to a man who acts confident…they can’t tell the difference between a man who is actually confident and one who acts confident

It’s a good thing too.

Of course, once Ross scores a few times, he’ll end up becoming more confident. And that will make it easier and easier.

If you want to become confident, you have to act confident. It’s that simple.

And it is working for Ross.

“They are all over me now,” Ross is reporting. “I already had a girl ask me out, and I have dates with two other hot girls that I met. One of them was on the street and we got into a conversation.”

Ross says that because of what I taught him, he has

Radar that picks up hot women without effort just by acting confident

 This radar gets hidden when men get too involved in:

1. Porn

2. Too much masturbation

3. Believing the tripe that is published and printed and put out about what women really want. This tripe is there because it is written by women and not by men who are willing to tell the truth.

man kissing woman

Not one man in 100 or 1000 even knows the truth about how to really attract women. The men who are “natural” at it know. And there are the PUAs, but they have their own problems.

Many pick up artists are terribly insecure and need to constantly pick up women in order to make themselves feel better about who they are.

The PUAs and the naturals can’t tell you what it really takes to appear confident and be the man that the women want. They are either oblivious to the truth, or they are acting out of their own insecurities.

No wonder I am angry. You can now understand why.

Nobody is telling men the truth!

You can be 100 pounds overweight and be massively attractive to women.

You can be poor as a churchmouse and get laid all you want.

What a woman wants is:

1. A man who will sweep her off her feet, and

2. Who acts confident in himself.

If you are looking for a great girlfriend you have to meet women first. With the right information rather than all the misinformation and lies, Ross has almost instantly displayed the confidence that overnight changes how women see him. And women are all over him without his having to “do” anything.

I’m doing a webinar on this method and I want to invite you. But before I do, I’m asking you to write one question you want answered. You can describe your situation and that would be helpful but be sure to ask a question.

I’ll take those questions into account and invite you to the webinar.

warmly

matt cook signature white background 

 

P.S. Remember, leave a question. Describe your story or situation if you want, that’s always helpful. I will use what you post and it’s public so use a nickname if you want to remain anonymous. And I’ll invite you to the webinar. Thanks!

 

 

How to choose pleasure and a happy life with full erections and maximum sensitivity

This article will be an eye opener for you if you’ve ever watched yourself do something that your higher self didn’t want you to do — but you felt powerless to stop yourself.

Now it’s all explained, and it will make you feel a lot better about your life and your behavior because it shows that it’s not your fault. You’ve been suffering because you are running programs that make you unhappy and nobody ever showed you that you had a choice in the matter!

So, one of the lessons here in these articles and in my courses is that we all run programs and that we are happiest if we choose our programs rather than just submit to being slaves to them.

young couple passionately kissing

Because nature doesn’t care if you’re happy. Nature wants you to stick your dick into more females and get them pregnant. Once that happens, nature isn’t all that interested in your happiness.

That’s one program anyway. The “stick your dick in as many pussies as possible and come inside them” program.

And it may be a good one sometimes, but not other times.

Another program can make you very happy for the rest of your life. And give you the most remarkable and amazing sex life you’ve ever experienced.

Choose your programs, and live a happy life.

And the main choice I see is what I call the 

Dopamine Track or the Oxytocin Track

I’ll talk about dopamine first.

You can’t live without dopamine.

Dopamine is the master hormone of want in the body.

Hungry? Dopamine makes you feel a desire for food. It makes you want that chocolate cake, or that ribeye steak, or those french fries.

Lusting after the new smart phone? That’s dopamine.

young couple kissing on ocean

See a pretty girl floating around your office? Dopamine makes you want her.

There are always other hormones involved, but dopamine is central to wanting something.

When you are under the influence of dopamine, your heart races a little, you sweat a little more, your blood pressure goes up,you hyperventilate just a little. You speed up.

This is the experience, whether you are conscious of it or not, when you shop online or in a store, when you really want a new car and you’re in the showroom.

Without dopamine, we wouldn’t have sex, we wouldn’t eat and we wouldn’t live

Dopamine pushes us into decisions and into doing stuff instead of thinking about doing stuff.

When you lust after your wife or girlfriend, there is a lot of dopamine involved.

When you lust after a new girl you first meet, that’s dopamine.

So dopamine is a wonderful thing and I love my dopamine!

However, living driven primarily by dopamine, what I call the Dopamine Track, does not create happiness.

The Dopamine Track makes us very dissatisfied and unhappy

Fred is a classic example. He was with Cindy for several years and reasonably happy. Then he met young Rachel at a party. Cindy was talking to her female friends, and Fred and Rachel practically bumped into each other and Fred says, “I knew I had to have her.”

That’s the Dopamine Track.

It’s want, want, want. Need to have, need to own, need to do.

That’s our friend Dopamine.

When Fred finally hooked up with Rachel, it was incredible. It felt incredible. It wasn’t like sex with Cindy which was kind of routine and boring. 

Sex with Rachel was amazing. And she was younger and tighter and everything like that.

sexy latina girl on couch

But that didn’t last. Not for long. Because here’s the problem with the Dopamine Track: When we get what we want, we aren’t happy.

Fred found after awhile that Rachel was clingy and annoying. Sometimes he’d look at her after he had come inside her, and wondered what he was doing with her.

It’s like when you are hungry and you see a big old tasty cake. You gorge on cake and you feel sick. 

The Dopamine Track makes you feel dissatisfied and unhappy after you’ve got what you want.

Then of course it sets in all over again. Fred was out looking for other women and he said to himself, what am I doing? Cindy is amazing. And I have Rachel on the side. Why am I looking at other women? How awful is that?”

This is the Dopamine Track. Always 

Looking for something new

Dopamine is all about novelty. If it’s not new, it’s not interesting.

New girls, new positions, new toys, new porn, new ways to get off.

And each time, the new is exciting because dopamine is exciting, but when we get what we want, it turns dull and now it’s time for the next thrill.

very sexy girl in bed

This is exactly what dopamine is supposed to do. Get us off our bottoms so instead of sitting around we go out and seek new pussy, or food, or something else we need or want.

But Dopamine creates constant dissatisfaction. We want, we get, and we are unhappy.

That’s why 

Dopamine is key in all addictive behaviors

Our brains have dopamine sensors and the sensors love getting bathed in dopamine. That’s part of what scientists call the “reward circuit” in the brain.

When we get into a behavior such as gambling, porn, or drugs, it’s all about constantly needing a fresh bath of dopamine on those brain sensors. We have to feel that dopamine or we get even more anxious, depressed and unhappy.

It always seems that the cure is whatever it is we are addicted to — the next bet, the next porn tube site, the next hit of free base.

It’s all the same to our brains — it’s an addiction that is actually an addiction to dopamine.

And all dopamine addiction is fixed the same way. Go cold turkey, handle the symptoms of things being flat, gray and boring…and eventually life turns colorful again.

But a gambler is always susceptible to gambling again. A drug user can return to the drug oh-so-easily.

four amazing athletic girls in bathing suits 

A porn user who has kicked porn can easily fall for porn again. Or it could be web cams, or having affairs. These are addictive behaviors when the dopamine kicks in and begins controlling us.

The Dopamine Track.

And the behaviors don’t just go away when we resist them successfully.

No, they are always there as a possibility.

The brain has these deep grooves in it, these nerve pathways deeply etched in the brain. These nerve pathways are always there — they fade away with less use, but they can easily be reactivated.

And the brain loves those addictions so much! 

The brain will always generate thoughts to bring back the addiction, whatever it is

“Oh, a little won’t hurt.”

“You’ve been so good, you should reward yourself.”

“Let’s just watch the porn and not masturbate to it.”

“I’ll just talk to her, I won’t try to go to bed with her.”

And a really good one:

“Now that I’ve cured myself of this addiction, let me test out how I’m cured.”

Testing is a huge perpetuator of the Dopamine Track. Our brain says, “let’s test, get hard masturbating a little, or watching a little porn, what’s wrong with that?”

A lot is wrong with that, but relapsing seems to be more common than not on the road to getting free from the Dopamine Track.

beautiful brunnette bust in black bra

Because we want to live our lives free from this. It is too controlling, too much like being ridden by the tiger. And it never satisfies for long, always puts us in a state of chronic dissatisfaction.

And for our friend Fred, it resulted in Cindy leaving him, and Fred taking one new girl to bed after the other, without any real connection with them and without any real happiness or love.

Fortunately, there is another track that we can live on and it is a sweet one. It’s the

Joy and pleasure of the Oxytocin Track

Oxytocin is the hormone that is found in our brains and in our testicles (and in women in their brains and in various other parts.)

Oxytocin is often called the “love hormone” but I would call it the “satisfaction hormone” because it makes you feel very satisfied with your life. 

It makes you feel very happy with your partner, and your children, and your mom and dad.

It makes you feel like you already have it all, that this is where you want to be, not somewhere else.

And most interesting of all is that

Oxytocin is tremendous for men’s erections

It makes erections last longer, come up quicker, and come back sooner after you ejaculate.

Guys all thing the major hormone for them is Testosterone. Testosterone is what makes a man a man, with a strong sex drive, muscles, lean and mean body, etc.

But Oxytocin is what makes a man feel happy and satisfied in his life.

What strikes me is that 

Oxytocin is the most amazing way to live because you feel such incredible pleasure

It makes sex the best thing in the whole world by a country mile.

It makes you want to have sex all the time, and it makes sex last and last.

And it makes the pleasure from sex equivalent with a little practice to a whole body orgasm that can last 30 minutes or an hour every time.

(Unless you want a quickie with her in which case 10 or 15 minutes…)

There is no more “I’m satisfied now what do we do next?”

Sex is never boring on the Oxytocin Track.

The problems couples have are not your problems anymore.

It is impossible for you to get bored with your partner. She is just more and more amazing all the time.

And in every other way, living on the Oxytocin Track takes the hungry want need and desperation out of life. You already have it all.

kissing black and white middle aged

Oxytocin helps cure depression. It makes anxiety melt away. It makes you love your family more. It makes you happy with life. It even makes you lose fat and eat less without effort.

You need both Oxytocin and Dopamine but one of the major benefits of the method and system I talk about in my courses is that your hormones get back into balance and you are no longer living on the Dopamine Track.

You can choose the Oxytocin Track and when you do, you will never look back. One of the best ways to do this is this way. Click here for a special offer only available until Saturday, January 4, 2014 midnight EST.

warmly

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P.S. Please also leave a comment or question here, the more involved you get, the quicker everything will get better and the better it is for other guys here to learn from you!