How long before my dick is hard and I can have great sex?

 

Here’s how to determine how long it may take to recover your full male performance 

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Any Idea how long the process takes ie from dead to normal Im going to quit viewing all porn and go back to reading non porn mags at night.

No wife anymore she passed away fom cancer over a year ago, but no lady friends either.

I need a lady in my life and sure can’t get one like this.

 

Any and all help will be appreciated.

Thanks

“Jim”

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I get a lot of emails every day and posts and Jim’s stands out for being super clear. “Help, I’m willing to do what it takes, but how long will this go on?”

In general 

The longer you’ve had the problem the longer it will take to fix it

However, if you’ve had a problem for 10 years, it won’t take 10 years to fix.

It may take weeks or months. It usually does not take years. Often it can be loads better in 3 or 4 weeks, and totally better in months.

I’ll tell you what the variables are so you can judge your own situation.

If you had this as a young man, it will take longer to get over it

The worst cases are for guys who discovered porn when they were boys. Some as young as 5 or 6.

It is a myth of course that boys and girls don’t have sexual feelings even at a young age. 

I can clearly remember playing outside when I was probably 5 or 6 and having sexual feelings.

girl lying down

And I began masturbating and using porn even before puberty. 

It took me longer to recover from erectile dysfunction and sexual problems because I got into this very early.

But the fact is that

If the first pussies you saw were on video, you really have to work hard to undo the damage

Young men today, say under about 30 years old, are really in a sucky situation. They grew up masturbating to video porn.

I didn’t have much video porn growing up, so the porn I used was less intense than video porn.

But if I had grown up with a lot of video porn, I’d have been in much worse trouble.

Video porn, especially today’s tube sites and cam sites, have thousands of women (see the earlier post 1000 Vaginas) and they desensitize the brain much worse and the damage takes much longer to fix.

The reason for this is that our early sexual experiences set up the first nerve pathways in our brain for enjoyment of sex.

Further sexual adventures deepen these early pathways.

If our early experience was with 1000 vaginas on a computer screen (or penises, or whips, or whatever it is, everything’s out there) then we will be missing the nerve pathways for healthy, sensitizing sex with a real woman and a real pussy. That just won’t excite our cock and get it hard for very long.

And this is not “all in your head” either — it’s real, physiological, an addiction that is actually far worse than addiction to heroin or freebase.

woman in bed yellow neglige small

So if you lack those early pathways for real women, you will have to work much harder and your recovery will take far longer.

But what about middle aged and older guys?

Yes it takes longer to recover if you have health problems

The most common problems guys have is symptoms of:

  • high blood pressure
  • overweight
  • acid relux
  • snoring
  • asthma
  • bowel and gut problems
  • depression and anxiety

 I see some heads nodding, guys saying, “yeah I have all those things!”

Well, the news here is, you CAN recover and have great sex even with those health problems. 

(I found that one thing super helpful is to get over these problems by naturally raising your testosterone levels. This system of raising your T naturally doesn’t involve drugs, expensive supplements or anything like that. I put it into a 4 hour course T Rewind that you can get and that will help you over these health issues.)

But if you have those health issues, the good news is, they don’t really stop recovery in most cases. I have found that

Guys who have major trauma, surgeries or procedures will take a bit longer to recover

 

Transplants, heart attack, cancer treatment…the docs do NOT do a good job at all of warning guys.

All major procedures on men should carry a warning: will make your erections soft or non-existent, may remove your sex drive, may hurt your ability to have sex for months or years.

swimming man and woman

Fortunately, the methods that I have outlined in my courses work for guys who have had major surgeries. These methods (which I’ll summarize at the end of this article) all work for getting rid of desensitization.

Because

Desensitization is the real culprit: fix desensitization and your erectile problems get better

This was discovered quite a long time ago. Before the drug companies realized they could collect a tax every time a guy wanted to have sex. Viagra was the first, but then the “me too” drugs came in, basically doing the same thing. It amounts to a tax on sex…so naturally they convince men they “need” this.

The tax is around $10 and the pills kind of work, or really work, for about 60% of men. They do not work for the other 40%, and they also have a terrible side effect —

The ED pills often make sensitization worse

So they are a treatment that makes the problem worse and many guys find that after a few years, the pills no longer work at all.

Plus, the ED pills don’t bring back the pleasure. They don’t bring back the sensitivity. They don’t make you feel more than you do.

They often make you feel less.

So if you’ve been down this road of the pills, and they’ve stopped working, its’ time to

Get serious about fixing desensitization, the cause of male performance problems.

When you fix your desensitization, you will get good erections that last a long time. And you won’t grind away, thrusting in and out with little feeling.

No, you’ll feel more than you have for 20 years or 30 years, maybe more than ever before (I feel more today than I recall even when I was a teenager.)

brunette white shirt cleavage small

But you have to stop believing that there is a shortcut. The path is clear but it does take your commitment.

1. Stop masturbation for awhile

2. Stop porn for good.

3. See if you can’t give up the pills for a bit (the ED pills I mean.)

4. Stop fantasy as best you can

5. Go through the “flatline” withdrawal stage

6. Emerge on the other side with morning erections again and the ability to love and make love

And the essential part is, if you have a woman, to spend all the time possible cuddling, kissing, holding hands, naked together, as that will build up Oxytocin and speed up your recovery.

You can be like this man:

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I’ve been following your advice for maybe a month now and have been practicing Karezza for maybe two months.

The member is working better then it ever has before.

My wife, who says she doesn’t enjoy Karezza, is up for intercourse ANYTIME and has taken to seducing me if we go more then a day without having intercourse.

This is very confusing but what the heck, it’s very wonderful too! I think the concept you teach regarding focusing on your self was a game changer for us.

My wife is very generous and really knows how to give pleasure.

Now I just relax into it and let her know what a delightful lover she is and how much I enjoy our sexual relationship and how happy I am with our new love life and her.

She’s 55 and I’m 66.

We’ve been together for 29 years.

I can’t speak for her but my half of our love life is better than anything I’ve ever experienced before. So good that I feel guilty about feeling so happy!

The sensitivity level of my penis is higher then it has ever been before and yes I get erections too just thinking about my wife.

I don’t do any porn and don’t masterbate at all any more.

I have also asked my wife to touch me VERY gently when she touches my penis, she has made penis touching into an art form, kind of like OM ing.

Well, I guess I’ve taken up enough of your time telling you how wonderful my new found love life is. I’m looking forward to more of your classes, the few that I have seen so far have been life changers.

–Senior from Minnesota

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The big ingredient in this is always going to be building up Oxytocin. Oxytocin is the true hormone that builds love and erections and great sex. I’ll have more on that in another article.

And in the meantime, the publishing company just caved in. We’ve had so many folks who complained and said they couldn’t watch the webinar due to schedules and so forth, and they’ve opened it up just for perhaps today. Go here to watch the “From Dead Down There To Raging Sexual Confidence” webinar while we take advantage of this short reprieve.

Meanwhile, write out your situation or question and let’s all learn from each other.

warmly

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Matt Cook

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Samuel owolabi

Is oxytocin is the solution to Ed.? How much is it

Ray

Matt i bought your first program on what to eat and so forth but i have been at it for about 6 weeks and still when i am near my wife i cant get anything up started to eat better and stuff almonds, Mach a powder and the essentials but still no go when im out during the day i will see another lady then i will get a little woody but when i lay near my wife its not there i please her any way but nothing in my department i guess so i don’t know what to do at the moment here i take iodine and what you have suggested no porn and so forth no masturbation ect but very little hard time so maybe prostate problem maybe.
Ha i could hang clothes or many jackets of this thing i had for many years with no problem but for the last 4 years no go my sex life was me take all the time and for the last 1 year or so i have learned to please my wife first then me but it seems like it has back fired on me for some reason and dont know yet when im use to taking and not giving then the game changes here and i dont know what to do with this thanks Ray

Russ

Im having problems!! got a girl willing for sex but I cant.1 out of 5 times n then I had help, hope you method helps me cause I dont want to lose her.

    Matt Cook

    Welcome here, Russ! Please post your full story if you feel it might help

    warmly

    –Matt

John

Hi , I’m 45 and I’m having problems. I can’t go as long and I go before my wife . I haven’t had morning wood for a long time. What’s wrong with me?! I never used too have this and idon’t drink or smoke and I am a skinny . I masturbated frequently .help

Paul

When you say ‘ED Pills’ does that also include the natural altenatives – or just the viagra, cialis big pharma pills?

    Matt Cook

    I’m really speaking about the big pharma drugs. You hear this from guys again and again — “they worked at first but then they stopped working.”

    It’s because the *cause* of the problem is desensitization and the drugs mask the symptoms. Meanwhile the cause continues eating away at sensitization and eventually the drugs no longer work.

    The same thing happens when you have a sore tendon. You should stretch, and remove the stress on the tendon, and let it heal. But if you go to the doctor and let her inject cortisone into the tendon, you can continue to function normally but meanwhile you are doing more damage to that tendon but you aren’t feeling it. Eventually the tendon injury becomes much worse.

    This is the problem I think with the ED meds from Big Pharma. I doubt the non-pharma supplements work much for guys at least they don’t work the way the pharma drugs do.

    warmly

    –Matt

      Paul

      Thanks Matt – I greatly appreciate you getting back to me on this…AND most importantly, your time and the approach you present. I listen to others and they put more pressure on guys to perform – stating (in essence), ‘gotta be a rock-star or she’s gonna cheat’. That doesn’t help any!
      However, can you please elaborate on whether or not you think the NON-pharma are bad, good or indifferent to the desensitization problem? To me, it seems as though you’re saying it masks the CAUSE, but doesn’t have the negative health effects. But do you know if there is a dependency or any other underlying issues the NON-pharma might cause? Of course, I know your program should be followed at the same time in order to get back to the Raging Bulls we all want to be.
      Thanks again Matt!

        Matt Cook

        Paul, glad you are here.

        I doubt that most non prescription supplements are going to cause the desensitization the way that Viagra/Cialis etc. do.

        I think some supplements can help libido and help restore health. Not sure if I believe these supplements can fix desensitization though.

        Your body is your laboratory so why not try it and see how it goes for you? Report back if you can, so we can all learn.

        warmly

        –Matt

      B.

      Matt,

      I’m curious about why do those drugs would make the desensitization worse in the long run. If you don’t fantasize, masturbate and watch porn but have normal sex with real women can’t you restore your sensivity while using those drugs in the beginning (as a part of the rewiring process)?
      Or would you say even then they are harmful?

Charles Edgington

I am a 8l year old white male with a real willie problem. At 75 I started using Viagra and then Cialis. Both of them eventually failed me. Then I tried the needle and finally the pump. Both were painful and non-effective. I still have a sex desire of a 30 year old, but my penis is dead,shot and just doesn’t work. I am at the point of having a penile implant, however,, there are some risks involved. I haven’t had much faith in your suggestions, but I just saw your ABC presentation, so I am thinking that maybe you are on to something. My problem now is a credit card problem. Twice I have had my crdit card used and abused. I would like to have your Big Bang and what goes with it for $27.00. Can I send a bank money order? I really would appreciate it.

wayne

I hear you talking about soft entry. What position are you in to do this and stay for awhile?

tun

great idea

Wayne Pitts

Have not had an erection sense Oct 19 when I had open heart surgery. Since
then have also had TURP surgery, is there any hope of getting an erection
and also stop feeling like I have to pee so often?

    Wayne Pitts

    Sorry need to amend that to Oct 19, 2010
    Wayne

T. John

I am a 62 year old white male. I stay very active. I work at a job that at times is fast pasted, volunteer, go to the gym two to three days a week and etc.
Not sure when I say this if there are others out there like me. I hate to admit/ashamed in saying this about me. But though out my life. I have had very few sex partners and most of the time gone with out for years, Because I could get it up and most others times I could not.
I use to know these twin sisters years ago. I dated both at different times and they knew I did. Both liked sex very much. The times I tried to have sex was very disastrous for me. I could just not get it up for either of these sisters. Not sure on there take. But it did have some on me
This has really effective me, my wanting to find some one, that is understanding and etc.
Periodically I see this one lady now and we do make out. She then gives me a hand job. At times I start to get hard and then I just go softed. This does not seem to in my view affect her. But it does me.
In closing at times I do watch porn and masturbate. Even at my age I would like to find some one. I am to my wits end.
Thanks for letting us write in questions. Any suggestions/help I would really appreciate it.

    Matt Cook

    One of the great things about this is to realize, you aren’t alone. Maybe thousands, hundreds of thousands, of other guys have the same experiences and you thought you were the only one. What a relief that is.

    And also, what a relief to know there is such hope for having great sex. And there is hope for that. You can do it, you are never too old to fix desensitization. It was all hidden from us by the media and the big drug companies. The media thinks that it is negative to report “there is something wrong to jerking it to porn for some (many?) men” and they just maintain a total silence on this problem. What’s up with that? And the drug companies, well we know where they’re at. And they “educate” the docs so there is NO info out there on this besides what we’re doing here.

    Glad you are here!

    warmly

    –Matt

      T. John

      Thanks for your advice and your help.

Ron

you are the first person that I have come across talking about this that actually says that looking and watching porn is bad and can really affect your ability to have amazing sex. I have read other places to masturbate a lot that it will help you stay erect longer when having sex. I used to know a guy who really got into porn and masturbating to the point he didn’t want to have sex with his wife and she was beautiful. I want to last longer BUT I don’t want to get into masturbating to where I would rather masturbate than be with a women.

Chris Gryce

To what extent is an enlarged prostrate responsible for erectile problems in an older male. Am single not in a relationship but my erections are almost non existent now or soft. I was okay till my mid 50’s. Am 66 now. Have used porn until fairly recently.

    Matt Cook

    Chris, it’s not really responsible in general. It sounds like desensitization rather than prostate enlargement that is the problem.

    warmly

    –Matt

jamie

You talk alot about guy who cant get erections. What about the guys who can, they just dont have much control over them. Ive struggled with it for years and Im in my early 30s. Ive embarrassed my self long enough and just want to know what it feels like to have good sex because I am able to keep it up. What do you recommend for controlling erections. I can get very hard but that just makes me so sensitive its hard to touch. Ive tried kegels, doesnt seem to work much. I think its more of anxiety thing because when Im naked it goes thru the roof!

    Matt Cook

    Premature ejaculation problems are also frequently (usually) a symptom of desensitization. The reason people get this confused is that “first timers” will have premature ejaculation from over-excitement, or at least they used to before the era of porn. Boys or young men didn’t see a pussy until they were ready to stick it in and they got really excited and came right away.

    But today’s premature ejaculation is entirely different. It is most often due to desensitization just as lack of erection or going soft is. And the treatment of desensitization is the same and often has a great result.

    It’s always easy to blame anxiety because let’s face it, when a guy has trouble with his willie, he gets anxious, LOL! Who wouldn’t be, right? But no guy really has direct control over his erections. It’s kind a relief really.

    warmly

    –Matt

Simon

I followed the Webinar and read your posts about 2 weeks ago. I have been an insulin dependent diabetic for over 40 years and believed what was always said. Following your advice I purchased Lugol’s iodine solution. have been taking as much as I can, while keeping the side effects under control. I have also been anointing myself with iodine impregnated Ground nut oil 3-4 times a week.

I have not had a worthwhile erection for the last 15 years and absolutely no sex for the last 5 years. I also have an extremely high sex drive, to the point of masturbating almost daily. I am now 70 years of age with the energy of a 40 year old.

Something is happening as I am waking up with the beginnings of a hard on during the last 4-5 days. Stopping the masturbation and the porn, is more difficult but am working at that. Will keep at the good work as it is certainly showing potential. Thanks Matt. I will be delighted to report further in a few weeks. Is there anything else that I should be doing. Am looking for a suitable lady to be sleeping with. My old Professor used to give a yearly lecture about naked contact especially with children by their mothers. He had a cleft palate and spoke through his nose ” Skin Contact is so important”……..”for everyone”

    Matt Cook

    Simon, congratulations, just steady on, man. Keep at it. Your old professor was so right, a very funny story BTW.

    You’ll keep waking up hard, and then spontaneous erections will come back and it just gets better and better. Time to go out and find a lucky lady somewhere.

    warmly

    –Matt

jim

Am 68 ,years old. Have not had sexual intercourse since 2007! I know it’s hard to believe. Was into watching porn, and masturbating to it. Have not done so, for over three months now. Am noticing some improvement. Not getting really hard, but am getting some spontaneous erections, but not really very firm erections. Have been watching my diet; no, or very little sugar(soft drinks) maybe one a week. No salads, small portions of meat, using real butter. Have seen the Big Bang videos. Not sure what else to do. Want to know, when I actually have sex with a woman, I will be able to satisfy her, physically (intercourse).Know I can give her orgasms orally,
Been divorced just over a year now. Not sure what to do next. Have been doing the exercises you recommended. have a very, very weak pc muscle. Feel my rear end tightening, when I attempt those exercises.

    Matt Cook

    Nice going Jim. Improvement is what you want. Just a little better most days, maybe not all days, but most. And then the improvement becomes more and more noticeable. It’s the way things work — a little better here and there, and over weeks a lot better.

    The rear end tightening thing is natural, it’s all part of the same muscle complex and a good sign. Just keep practicing.

    Next, find a lucky lady and start some naked skin on skin contact. That is by far the healthiest best way to recover so long as you are avoiding porn and fantasy and trying not to masturbate for awhile.

    warmly

    –Matt

John

Hello,
I have tried everything…the ED pills even injecting into my penis some drug that’s supposedly guaranteed to make a dead man hard.
Not so much for me. It did make me harder but never at full attention, so to speak. It also caused some type of damage as now it seemed to have bent half way down the shaft when a erection (mild) did happen. I stopped taking the shots immediately afterward and looked elsewhere. I am taking these pills (Androzene) 3 a day and now the doctor put me on Cialis 5mg a day for BPH a prostate reducing effect…thing is, my prostate is not enlarged, lol. BUT, I have noticed a harder erection but a “not quite there” one.
I am certainly willing to cease porn and masturbation but want to ask if someone like me can get things working well again. I am 61, in great physical shape, 175lb. 5’10”. I just feel so short changed when everything else seems to normal. I am also a diabetic but have no symptoms aside from this. I am very active as well.
My Question:
Can I recover to be as hard as I was before this? I have had issues and started Viagra about 6 years ago worked great then nothing now.
Thank you for any help, in advance.
John

    Matt Cook

    John, I am 100% positive you can get things working again.

    What did your urologist say about the bend in your penis? I suspect this may be a little scarring but it can go away after awhile and certainly doesn’t hamper the fun. Girls might find it intriguing, actually.

    I’m not a doctor but I’d do more research on the idea of taking Cialis for BPH. I personally would try to avoid Cialis and go a natural route if possible but discuss with your doctor first of course. The Cialis seems to cause the desensitization to get worse just as the Viagra did and stops working after awhile.

    warmly

    –Matt

Kevin

I saw the urologist today. I asked him about masturbation, he told me it is good for me and advised that I masturbate as frequently as possible, three times a week at a minimum. They did some sort of penis nerve test and said everything was fine.
What do you think Matt?

Joseph

Thanks Matt! Keep up the great work.

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