Category Archives for great sex for life

How to choose pleasure and a happy life with full erections and maximum sensitivity

This article will be an eye opener for you if you’ve ever watched yourself do something that your higher self didn’t want you to do — but you felt powerless to stop yourself.

Now it’s all explained, and it will make you feel a lot better about your life and your behavior because it shows that it’s not your fault. You’ve been suffering because you are running programs that make you unhappy and nobody ever showed you that you had a choice in the matter!

So, one of the lessons here in these articles and in my courses is that we all run programs and that we are happiest if we choose our programs rather than just submit to being slaves to them.

young couple passionately kissing

Because nature doesn’t care if you’re happy. Nature wants you to stick your dick into more females and get them pregnant. Once that happens, nature isn’t all that interested in your happiness.

That’s one program anyway. The “stick your dick in as many pussies as possible and come inside them” program.

And it may be a good one sometimes, but not other times.

Another program can make you very happy for the rest of your life. And give you the most remarkable and amazing sex life you’ve ever experienced.

Choose your programs, and live a happy life.

And the main choice I see is what I call the 

Dopamine Track or the Oxytocin Track

I’ll talk about dopamine first.

You can’t live without dopamine.

Dopamine is the master hormone of want in the body.

Hungry? Dopamine makes you feel a desire for food. It makes you want that chocolate cake, or that ribeye steak, or those french fries.

Lusting after the new smart phone? That’s dopamine.

young couple kissing on ocean

See a pretty girl floating around your office? Dopamine makes you want her.

There are always other hormones involved, but dopamine is central to wanting something.

When you are under the influence of dopamine, your heart races a little, you sweat a little more, your blood pressure goes up,you hyperventilate just a little. You speed up.

This is the experience, whether you are conscious of it or not, when you shop online or in a store, when you really want a new car and you’re in the showroom.

Without dopamine, we wouldn’t have sex, we wouldn’t eat and we wouldn’t live

Dopamine pushes us into decisions and into doing stuff instead of thinking about doing stuff.

When you lust after your wife or girlfriend, there is a lot of dopamine involved.

When you lust after a new girl you first meet, that’s dopamine.

So dopamine is a wonderful thing and I love my dopamine!

However, living driven primarily by dopamine, what I call the Dopamine Track, does not create happiness.

The Dopamine Track makes us very dissatisfied and unhappy

Fred is a classic example. He was with Cindy for several years and reasonably happy. Then he met young Rachel at a party. Cindy was talking to her female friends, and Fred and Rachel practically bumped into each other and Fred says, “I knew I had to have her.”

That’s the Dopamine Track.

It’s want, want, want. Need to have, need to own, need to do.

That’s our friend Dopamine.

When Fred finally hooked up with Rachel, it was incredible. It felt incredible. It wasn’t like sex with Cindy which was kind of routine and boring. 

Sex with Rachel was amazing. And she was younger and tighter and everything like that.

sexy latina girl on couch

But that didn’t last. Not for long. Because here’s the problem with the Dopamine Track: When we get what we want, we aren’t happy.

Fred found after awhile that Rachel was clingy and annoying. Sometimes he’d look at her after he had come inside her, and wondered what he was doing with her.

It’s like when you are hungry and you see a big old tasty cake. You gorge on cake and you feel sick. 

The Dopamine Track makes you feel dissatisfied and unhappy after you’ve got what you want.

Then of course it sets in all over again. Fred was out looking for other women and he said to himself, what am I doing? Cindy is amazing. And I have Rachel on the side. Why am I looking at other women? How awful is that?”

This is the Dopamine Track. Always 

Looking for something new

Dopamine is all about novelty. If it’s not new, it’s not interesting.

New girls, new positions, new toys, new porn, new ways to get off.

And each time, the new is exciting because dopamine is exciting, but when we get what we want, it turns dull and now it’s time for the next thrill.

very sexy girl in bed

This is exactly what dopamine is supposed to do. Get us off our bottoms so instead of sitting around we go out and seek new pussy, or food, or something else we need or want.

But Dopamine creates constant dissatisfaction. We want, we get, and we are unhappy.

That’s why 

Dopamine is key in all addictive behaviors

Our brains have dopamine sensors and the sensors love getting bathed in dopamine. That’s part of what scientists call the “reward circuit” in the brain.

When we get into a behavior such as gambling, porn, or drugs, it’s all about constantly needing a fresh bath of dopamine on those brain sensors. We have to feel that dopamine or we get even more anxious, depressed and unhappy.

It always seems that the cure is whatever it is we are addicted to — the next bet, the next porn tube site, the next hit of free base.

It’s all the same to our brains — it’s an addiction that is actually an addiction to dopamine.

And all dopamine addiction is fixed the same way. Go cold turkey, handle the symptoms of things being flat, gray and boring…and eventually life turns colorful again.

But a gambler is always susceptible to gambling again. A drug user can return to the drug oh-so-easily.

four amazing athletic girls in bathing suits 

A porn user who has kicked porn can easily fall for porn again. Or it could be web cams, or having affairs. These are addictive behaviors when the dopamine kicks in and begins controlling us.

The Dopamine Track.

And the behaviors don’t just go away when we resist them successfully.

No, they are always there as a possibility.

The brain has these deep grooves in it, these nerve pathways deeply etched in the brain. These nerve pathways are always there — they fade away with less use, but they can easily be reactivated.

And the brain loves those addictions so much! 

The brain will always generate thoughts to bring back the addiction, whatever it is

“Oh, a little won’t hurt.”

“You’ve been so good, you should reward yourself.”

“Let’s just watch the porn and not masturbate to it.”

“I’ll just talk to her, I won’t try to go to bed with her.”

And a really good one:

“Now that I’ve cured myself of this addiction, let me test out how I’m cured.”

Testing is a huge perpetuator of the Dopamine Track. Our brain says, “let’s test, get hard masturbating a little, or watching a little porn, what’s wrong with that?”

A lot is wrong with that, but relapsing seems to be more common than not on the road to getting free from the Dopamine Track.

beautiful brunnette bust in black bra

Because we want to live our lives free from this. It is too controlling, too much like being ridden by the tiger. And it never satisfies for long, always puts us in a state of chronic dissatisfaction.

And for our friend Fred, it resulted in Cindy leaving him, and Fred taking one new girl to bed after the other, without any real connection with them and without any real happiness or love.

Fortunately, there is another track that we can live on and it is a sweet one. It’s the

Joy and pleasure of the Oxytocin Track

Oxytocin is the hormone that is found in our brains and in our testicles (and in women in their brains and in various other parts.)

Oxytocin is often called the “love hormone” but I would call it the “satisfaction hormone” because it makes you feel very satisfied with your life. 

It makes you feel very happy with your partner, and your children, and your mom and dad.

It makes you feel like you already have it all, that this is where you want to be, not somewhere else.

And most interesting of all is that

Oxytocin is tremendous for men’s erections

It makes erections last longer, come up quicker, and come back sooner after you ejaculate.

Guys all thing the major hormone for them is Testosterone. Testosterone is what makes a man a man, with a strong sex drive, muscles, lean and mean body, etc.

But Oxytocin is what makes a man feel happy and satisfied in his life.

What strikes me is that 

Oxytocin is the most amazing way to live because you feel such incredible pleasure

It makes sex the best thing in the whole world by a country mile.

It makes you want to have sex all the time, and it makes sex last and last.

And it makes the pleasure from sex equivalent with a little practice to a whole body orgasm that can last 30 minutes or an hour every time.

(Unless you want a quickie with her in which case 10 or 15 minutes…)

There is no more “I’m satisfied now what do we do next?”

Sex is never boring on the Oxytocin Track.

The problems couples have are not your problems anymore.

It is impossible for you to get bored with your partner. She is just more and more amazing all the time.

And in every other way, living on the Oxytocin Track takes the hungry want need and desperation out of life. You already have it all.

kissing black and white middle aged

Oxytocin helps cure depression. It makes anxiety melt away. It makes you love your family more. It makes you happy with life. It even makes you lose fat and eat less without effort.

You need both Oxytocin and Dopamine but one of the major benefits of the method and system I talk about in my courses is that your hormones get back into balance and you are no longer living on the Dopamine Track.

You can choose the Oxytocin Track and when you do, you will never look back. One of the best ways to do this is this way. Click here for a special offer only available until Saturday, January 4, 2014 midnight EST.

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P.S. Please also leave a comment or question here, the more involved you get, the quicker everything will get better and the better it is for other guys here to learn from you!

 

How long before my dick is hard and I can have great sex?

 

Here’s how to determine how long it may take to recover your full male performance 

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Any Idea how long the process takes ie from dead to normal Im going to quit viewing all porn and go back to reading non porn mags at night.

No wife anymore she passed away fom cancer over a year ago, but no lady friends either.

I need a lady in my life and sure can’t get one like this.

 

Any and all help will be appreciated.

Thanks

“Jim”

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I get a lot of emails every day and posts and Jim’s stands out for being super clear. “Help, I’m willing to do what it takes, but how long will this go on?”

In general 

The longer you’ve had the problem the longer it will take to fix it

However, if you’ve had a problem for 10 years, it won’t take 10 years to fix.

It may take weeks or months. It usually does not take years. Often it can be loads better in 3 or 4 weeks, and totally better in months.

I’ll tell you what the variables are so you can judge your own situation.

If you had this as a young man, it will take longer to get over it

The worst cases are for guys who discovered porn when they were boys. Some as young as 5 or 6.

It is a myth of course that boys and girls don’t have sexual feelings even at a young age. 

I can clearly remember playing outside when I was probably 5 or 6 and having sexual feelings.

girl lying down

And I began masturbating and using porn even before puberty. 

It took me longer to recover from erectile dysfunction and sexual problems because I got into this very early.

But the fact is that

If the first pussies you saw were on video, you really have to work hard to undo the damage

Young men today, say under about 30 years old, are really in a sucky situation. They grew up masturbating to video porn.

I didn’t have much video porn growing up, so the porn I used was less intense than video porn.

But if I had grown up with a lot of video porn, I’d have been in much worse trouble.

Video porn, especially today’s tube sites and cam sites, have thousands of women (see the earlier post 1000 Vaginas) and they desensitize the brain much worse and the damage takes much longer to fix.

The reason for this is that our early sexual experiences set up the first nerve pathways in our brain for enjoyment of sex.

Further sexual adventures deepen these early pathways.

If our early experience was with 1000 vaginas on a computer screen (or penises, or whips, or whatever it is, everything’s out there) then we will be missing the nerve pathways for healthy, sensitizing sex with a real woman and a real pussy. That just won’t excite our cock and get it hard for very long.

And this is not “all in your head” either — it’s real, physiological, an addiction that is actually far worse than addiction to heroin or freebase.

woman in bed yellow neglige small

So if you lack those early pathways for real women, you will have to work much harder and your recovery will take far longer.

But what about middle aged and older guys?

Yes it takes longer to recover if you have health problems

The most common problems guys have is symptoms of:

  • high blood pressure
  • overweight
  • acid relux
  • snoring
  • asthma
  • bowel and gut problems
  • depression and anxiety

 I see some heads nodding, guys saying, “yeah I have all those things!”

Well, the news here is, you CAN recover and have great sex even with those health problems. 

(I found that one thing super helpful is to get over these problems by naturally raising your testosterone levels. This system of raising your T naturally doesn’t involve drugs, expensive supplements or anything like that. I put it into a 4 hour course T Rewind that you can get and that will help you over these health issues.)

But if you have those health issues, the good news is, they don’t really stop recovery in most cases. I have found that

Guys who have major trauma, surgeries or procedures will take a bit longer to recover

 

Transplants, heart attack, cancer treatment…the docs do NOT do a good job at all of warning guys.

All major procedures on men should carry a warning: will make your erections soft or non-existent, may remove your sex drive, may hurt your ability to have sex for months or years.

swimming man and woman

Fortunately, the methods that I have outlined in my courses work for guys who have had major surgeries. These methods (which I’ll summarize at the end of this article) all work for getting rid of desensitization.

Because

Desensitization is the real culprit: fix desensitization and your erectile problems get better

This was discovered quite a long time ago. Before the drug companies realized they could collect a tax every time a guy wanted to have sex. Viagra was the first, but then the “me too” drugs came in, basically doing the same thing. It amounts to a tax on sex…so naturally they convince men they “need” this.

The tax is around $10 and the pills kind of work, or really work, for about 60% of men. They do not work for the other 40%, and they also have a terrible side effect —

The ED pills often make sensitization worse

So they are a treatment that makes the problem worse and many guys find that after a few years, the pills no longer work at all.

Plus, the ED pills don’t bring back the pleasure. They don’t bring back the sensitivity. They don’t make you feel more than you do.

They often make you feel less.

So if you’ve been down this road of the pills, and they’ve stopped working, its’ time to

Get serious about fixing desensitization, the cause of male performance problems.

When you fix your desensitization, you will get good erections that last a long time. And you won’t grind away, thrusting in and out with little feeling.

No, you’ll feel more than you have for 20 years or 30 years, maybe more than ever before (I feel more today than I recall even when I was a teenager.)

brunette white shirt cleavage small

But you have to stop believing that there is a shortcut. The path is clear but it does take your commitment.

1. Stop masturbation for awhile

2. Stop porn for good.

3. See if you can’t give up the pills for a bit (the ED pills I mean.)

4. Stop fantasy as best you can

5. Go through the “flatline” withdrawal stage

6. Emerge on the other side with morning erections again and the ability to love and make love

And the essential part is, if you have a woman, to spend all the time possible cuddling, kissing, holding hands, naked together, as that will build up Oxytocin and speed up your recovery.

You can be like this man:

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I’ve been following your advice for maybe a month now and have been practicing Karezza for maybe two months.

The member is working better then it ever has before.

My wife, who says she doesn’t enjoy Karezza, is up for intercourse ANYTIME and has taken to seducing me if we go more then a day without having intercourse.

This is very confusing but what the heck, it’s very wonderful too! I think the concept you teach regarding focusing on your self was a game changer for us.

My wife is very generous and really knows how to give pleasure.

Now I just relax into it and let her know what a delightful lover she is and how much I enjoy our sexual relationship and how happy I am with our new love life and her.

She’s 55 and I’m 66.

We’ve been together for 29 years.

I can’t speak for her but my half of our love life is better than anything I’ve ever experienced before. So good that I feel guilty about feeling so happy!

The sensitivity level of my penis is higher then it has ever been before and yes I get erections too just thinking about my wife.

I don’t do any porn and don’t masterbate at all any more.

I have also asked my wife to touch me VERY gently when she touches my penis, she has made penis touching into an art form, kind of like OM ing.

Well, I guess I’ve taken up enough of your time telling you how wonderful my new found love life is. I’m looking forward to more of your classes, the few that I have seen so far have been life changers.

–Senior from Minnesota

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The big ingredient in this is always going to be building up Oxytocin. Oxytocin is the true hormone that builds love and erections and great sex. I’ll have more on that in another article.

And in the meantime, the publishing company just caved in. We’ve had so many folks who complained and said they couldn’t watch the webinar due to schedules and so forth, and they’ve opened it up just for perhaps today. Go here to watch the “From Dead Down There To Raging Sexual Confidence” webinar while we take advantage of this short reprieve.

Meanwhile, write out your situation or question and let’s all learn from each other.

warmly

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1000 Vaginas

Ever watch a dog eat its dinner?

A dog gobbles up his food quick as can be. One minute the dish is down, the next moment it’s all scarfed up.

Dogs eat this way because they evolved to compete with other dogs. They evolved to get as much food as quickly as possible before the next dog got it and left nothing.

Today, our family pet dog doesn’t need to eat fast. He can enjoy his meal slowly. He can savor it.

But dogs still have their instinctual programming to eat as quickly as they can.

It’s sad in a way. I wish ol’ Bowser would just taste his food. But his programming doesn’t allow him to take his time.

What if you and I are just as conditioned? And what if we are conditioned sexually by nature to have poor sex, quick sex, and to become unhappy with our partners and endlessly dissatisfied?

What if…

We evolved to have sex a certain way…which today doesn’t make us happy or satisfied

So that brings me to today’s topic which is quite an interesting one.

And I have to thank Len for coming up with the “1000 vaginas syndrome” for the problem of porn use and the fact that excessive novelty today can desensitize us.

Our cellphones, our computers, can cause us to have problems getting hard and staying hard.

Even this photo can cause a little more desensitization. I’d advise you to defocus your eyes or look past it. Not let yourself get too “into it”…if you are recovering from erectile issues…

a photo of a pretty girl can cause erectile dysfunction

Here’s the full story.

Len realized after reading a recent article here that porn was causing ED and other problems and he has quit porn and masturbation for a bit.

Well, hopefully porn quitting is forever. Masturbation is fine in limited doses as long as there isn’t porn in there.

I thought I’d talk about a part of this that is key to recovery, and that is, avoiding triggers like Facebook and Youtube and Craigslist and dating sites.

It’s the quest for new bodies, new positions, new women, new situations that is so desensitizing

A lot of guys think it’s the porn itself, but that is only part of what is so crippling for guys’ brains and penises.

The other part of it is novelty. New this, new that. New girls.

And the reason is that we are designed in our “reptile brain” to become more excited and turned on by a new woman.

Here’s the scenario. Thor Caveboy spends his days and nights with Thorette, the Cavegirl.

They sleep together, eat together, hold each other and then it’s penis-in-vagina time for a quick bit of horizontal action. Thor ejaculates into Thorette and rolls over onto a matt of grass in the floor of the cave and goes to sleep. 

One day, Thor is scouting out a new area to hunt some delicious looking rabbits, when he hears an intriguing sound. He sees this very young, fertile female in a clearing. He gets hard seeing her, and she sees him and figures, hey why not, try out a little Thor action.

two cavegirls

(Women are designed to take these opportunities also…they can get pregnant by a big virile man like Thor, and have their life partner bring up the baby without knowing it isn’t his…well, this presents an advantage to a girl genetically because she might create a genetically superior baby girl or boy with Thor’s genes…)

So now, Thor and this new girl go at it. Thor zips up his cavepants and continues on his way, and the girl continues on her way.

This is why men are designed to get hard and be able to come so fast.

Remember the dog eating his dinner?

And it’s also why men are designed to find novel women appealing. So men can take advantage of these opportunities at the drop of a hat.

A quick sidenote about how women are designed…

Women on the other hand are designed to get wet and get turned on over a period of time, in order to bond better with their men.

BUT, research shows, interestingly enough, that women get wet involuntarily even when they see pix or videos of sex, any sex, such as that between animals, or sex between adults that aren’t consenting. Weird but true.

Women do this as involuntarily as anything else, they are not turned on consciously but their bodies lubricate their vaginas to protect them in event they are made to have sex.

We are all designed a certain way. By being conscious of that design, we can have a much happier life than if we just follow our natural instincts. That is one of the primary themes that we talk about here.

In fact, a guy who is having “normal type” sex with a girl for a long time will often grow bored with his girl. A new girl, well that’s entirely different.

The new girl can stimulate the guy in a new way.

It works this way because

Nature wants you to get girls pregnant, not to be happy

We’re designed to see an opportunity and take it, right then and there. And that is why we are designed to get stimulated when a novel female is around.

But today’s Internet produces 1000 vaginas, or 1000 naked girls, in a parade of novelty. It’s like a constant parade of cake and candy and cookies to a diabetic. Or syringe after syringe of concentrated heroin to the addict. You get the picture.

very pretty girls - with these girls you don't want to experience erectile dysfunction do you? 

And that’s how it is with porn. 1000 vaginas describes it perfectly, but it doesn’t have to be vaginas.

Let me be very clear.

Even surfing fully clothed pix of women on “legit” dating sites, or Craigslist personals, can cause ED problems

That’s because even surfing fully clothed pix of women on a “legit” dating site can be very desensitizing. After you’ve recovered from your erection problems, you’ll notice that surfing novel females online hits you pretty hard.

It makes your dick softer.

It makes you feel less satisfied about your partner.

It makes you feel less satisfied with your life.

Surfing novel females, even fully clothed, is just as bad as porn in many ways.

surfing porn

The “one girl after the other” thing gets our heart beating faster, our blood pressure up, our penis slightly harder, and worse is it desensitizes our brains just a little more with each girl’s picture.

So if you are having problems getting an erection, or maintaining one, or problems with ejaculation, or not being very hard, or going soft when you don’t want to…you are very smart if you eliminate all this:

  • No dating site pix
  • No surfing Youtube
  • No Facebook except for posting a quick message now and then
  • No looking at pix your male friends forward to you of nude women
  • No Craigslist personals

This will help your recovery quicker than anything else.

And if you haven’t done so, you can today register for this eye opening webinar “From Dead Down There to Raging Confidence.) Click here to attend the webinar

And please leave your experiences here — put a comment or question below.

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Wow, my dick problems are getting better – the three stages of recovery

What does it look like to recover and reverse your desensitization.

I thought I’d show you what this looks like here today. And make some silly puns at the same time.

Ready? So, let’s focus first on

Stage 1 – realize that desensitization is the cause of the problem

This is where most guys are today. They know they are having issues. Their penis isn’t getting as hard as it did before. 

Or they have trouble coming. It’s grind away time with not much feeling and not able to close the deal. 

Or they come too fast and it’s over so quick. How embarrassing to shoot your wad so fast and the dick goes limp and she hasn’t had much time yet to even warm up.

pretty asian girl

Or, perhaps the dick isn’t getting hard at all.

Or it’s only hard for masturbation and not for intercourse.

Or maybe it takes so much work on her part to get the dick hard that it’s like climbing Mount Everest for something that should be fun and easy, right?

No wonder guys have so many problems today and think they are going downhill and need chemicals to pep them up. It’s because

Big pharma has given us a cock and bull story.

(Aahaha, pun intended).

One big drug company accidentally discovered Viagra and how quickly they realized, hey we can make ten bucks every time a guy wants to stick it in his girl. At an average of almost twice a week that’ like seventy bucks a month.

(All the other big drug companies soon came up with similar drugs, what are called in the drug industry “me too” drugs because those other drugs compete with Viagra as in “me too, I keep men hard too, take me instead of Viagra” but these all work the same exact way Viagra works, although some may cause fewer or more side effects or last longer.)

(By the way, guys who make it through my method end up having sex every day, several times a day, or every other day…and for 30 or 60 minutes, not the average of under 3 minutes.)

That Viagra discovery and profit calculation was the beginning of the end for guys who aren’t being told the truth. In working with guys I find that

ED pills make desensitization worse

The pills may not cause desensitization to get worse, but they cause a man to engage in the same type of sex and this perhaps is the reason that with the pills, guys often tend to get worse. The pills work for awhile, but they don’t increase the pleasure or sensation, and ultimately erection problems are worse. And stuff like “I can’t come easily” gets worse…

And, after all, the docs themselves are well meaning. I don’t blame the docs for this. They go through medical school without knowing dick about this problem or its cause (pun intended again) because the drug companies call the shots in terms of research and education.

And drug companies don’t want doctors to know the truth either.

pretty asian girl non porn

So the docs often have the problem themselves. Often. I can’t tell you how many medical guys I’ve spoken to and helped change their life. They are as surprised as anyone to learn about desensitization.

And it’s all because the real cause is being kept from guys. It’s a big conspiracy in my opinion.

So now a guy knows the problem, so the next step is to move to stage 2 and 

Stop porn viewing, fantasy and masturbation (for awhile)

Porn viewing is what causes a lot of dick problems. If you view porn even once a week, or even once a month, and you are not happy with your erections, then you must cut out the porn.

And it isn’t just porn. It’s also just seeing a parade of novel women, surfing personal ads or dating sites. Getting triggers from ads on TV or billboards or emails or Facebook.

It’s challenging stuff. When someone hasn’t recovered and they say, “Matt, I quit porn etc.” I ask them about fantasy and usually this is the culprit.

Fantasy is to the reptile brain the same as something real. But it’s much more intense than something real.

I mean, in the real world I stick my penis in her vagina and we dwell together and it ain’t like the porn scenes.

romantic couple

Plus, I have the same woman that I stick my penis in, not different ones. My brain as a man is very sensitive to seeing a parade of hot fake or unavailable women and it loses sensitivity to my real woman when it sees to many of those fake hotties.

It’s something I never understood before. Because my brain was so desensitized for like the past zillion years that I never noticed it.

Now I notice this effect a lot. I was explaining this to a friend yesterday. I don’t like looking at sexy photos of women because I am so aware of how it affects my perceptions and pleasures with my real woman.

I love looking at a pretty girl, of course. And I do all the time. But I avoid looking at photos, two dimensional images, anything that triggers a sexual thought and that isn’t real.

It just messes up my perceptions and my feelings. And it is doing the same to you but you may not be aware of it yet.

So now fortunately stage 3 happens…

Become much more attractive to women…and begin having a much better time with sex

This is when you get the fact that partner sex and masturbation are so different.

Partner sex becomes really fantastic again. And masturbation has lost its attraction.

Quite frankly, it can get to a point where you don’t masturbate at all.

Not because you are trying not to, but because it is so satisfying having this time with your penis in her vagina and soaking her up that it’s just not even interesting anymore to masturbate.

And the women all over become so much more attracted to you and start giving you signals everywhere.

flirty girl and guy

 

I’m nothing special in the looks department. And even I can’t go out without some woman giving me a signal, perhaps touching my shoulder at the restaurant like happened the other day. Or giving me a frank stare and tossing her hair.

It’s not like I’m anything incredible looking either. It’s just the power of normal male sexual energy.

Because today

Women aren’t used to basking in a man’s built up (normal) sexual energy

They are used to guys who spill their seed at every opportunity and guys who can’t get it up, and guys who are so porn-ified.

Of course there are plenty of virile men but the percentage today is way down.

So you stand out at this point (pun intended, LOL.) You really do. (Note to young guys: get with it, you have an edge in the looks department but older guys who recover are going to be eating your lunch.)

cute girl and guy meeting up

It’s amazing how much confidence you show at this point, even if you are normally somewhat inhibited, shy or reserved.

It doesn’t matter if shy, reserved or even timid is your outward personality.

Inside, your reptile brain is back into balance and it’s a naturally confident brain, and one that just wants to love and make love.

Your reptile brain is now completely confident and it puts out pheromones and confidence signals that women pick up on without your having to do anything, think anything or be anything but who you are. 

It’s at this point that I find 

Men are surprised to discover how confident they become

It’s striking, and this confidence isn’t about just being confident with women.

Here’s a huge secret of attraction and it doesn’t matter if it’s re-attracting your wife to wake her up sexually or landing a gorgeous girlfriend who really digs on you.

The secret is that women are attracted to men who are confident with other men.

That’s right. If you are confident in your dealings with other men, women will be all over you.

And what makes you confident with men and with women is that same male sexual energy.

confident man over woman sexual confidence shows

 

It surges in you and makes you feel like a total winner. And men get out of your way. They defer to you. They respect you even if you don’t say a word. You don’t have to say a word, they get these signals automatically.

This is what makes you more alpha if you want to call it that. And that attracts women and makes you even more alpha, in a virtuous circle.

There is a lot more to all this. But what you may want to do is head over to my From Dead Down There to Raging Sexual Confidence webinar which I’m able to give, thanks to my publisher allowing me to. Click to see what it’s all about.

And please leave a comment, question or concern here. Thank you

warmly

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Stop trying to get an erection – and get an erection

What does it look like to recover and reverse your desensitization.

I thought I’d show you what this looks like here today. And make some silly puns at the same time.

Ready? So, let’s focus first on

Stage 1 – realize that desensitization is the cause of the problem

This is where most guys are today. They know they are having issues. Their penis isn’t getting as hard as it did before. 

Or they have trouble coming. It’s grind away time with not much feeling and not able to close the deal. 

Or they come too fast and it’s over so quick. How embarrassing to shoot your wad so fast and the dick goes limp and she hasn’t had much time yet to even warm up.

pretty asian girl

Or, perhaps the dick isn’t getting hard at all.

Or it’s only hard for masturbation and not for intercourse.

Or maybe it takes so much work on her part to get the dick hard that it’s like climbing Mount Everest for something that should be fun and easy, right?

No wonder guys have so many problems today and think they are going downhill and need chemicals to pep them up. It’s because

Big pharma has given us a cock and bull story.

(Aahaha, pun intended).

One big drug company accidentally discovered Viagra and how quickly they realized, hey we can make ten bucks every time a guy wants to stick it in his girl. At an average of almost twice a week that’ like seventy bucks a month.

(All the other big drug companies soon came up with similar drugs, what are called in the drug industry “me too” drugs because those other drugs compete with Viagra as in “me too, I keep men hard too, take me instead of Viagra” but these all work the same exact way Viagra works, although some may cause fewer or more side effects or last longer.)

(By the way, guys who make it through my method end up having sex every day, several times a day, or every other day…and for 30 or 60 minutes, not the average of under 3 minutes.)

That Viagra discovery and profit calculation was the beginning of the end for guys who aren’t being told the truth. In working with guys I find that

ED pills make desensitization worse

The pills may not cause desensitization to get worse, but they cause a man to engage in the same type of sex and this perhaps is the reason that with the pills, guys often tend to get worse. The pills work for awhile, but they don’t increase the pleasure or sensation, and ultimately erection problems are worse. And stuff like “I can’t come easily” gets worse…

And, after all, the docs themselves are well meaning. I don’t blame the docs for this. They go through medical school without knowing dick about this problem or its cause (pun intended again) because the drug companies call the shots in terms of research and education.

And drug companies don’t want doctors to know the truth either.

pretty asian girl non porn

So the docs often have the problem themselves. Often. I can’t tell you how many medical guys I’ve spoken to and helped change their life. They are as surprised as anyone to learn about desensitization.

And it’s all because the real cause is being kept from guys. It’s a big conspiracy in my opinion.

So now a guy knows the problem, so the next step is to move to stage 2 and 

Stop porn viewing, fantasy and masturbation (for awhile)

Porn viewing is what causes a lot of dick problems. If you view porn even once a week, or even once a month, and you are not happy with your erections, then you must cut out the porn.

And it isn’t just porn. It’s also just seeing a parade of novel women, surfing personal ads or dating sites. Getting triggers from ads on TV or billboards or emails or Facebook.

It’s challenging stuff. When someone hasn’t recovered and they say, “Matt, I quit porn etc.” I ask them about fantasy and usually this is the culprit.

Fantasy is to the reptile brain the same as something real. But it’s much more intense than something real.

I mean, in the real world I stick my penis in her vagina and we dwell together and it ain’t like the porn scenes.

romantic couple

Plus, I have the same woman that I stick my penis in, not different ones. My brain as a man is very sensitive to seeing a parade of hot fake or unavailable women and it loses sensitivity to my real woman when it sees to many of those fake hotties.

It’s something I never understood before. Because my brain was so desensitized for like the past zillion years that I never noticed it.

Now I notice this effect a lot. I was explaining this to a friend yesterday. I don’t like looking at sexy photos of women because I am so aware of how it affects my perceptions and pleasures with my real woman.

I love looking at a pretty girl, of course. And I do all the time. But I avoid looking at photos, two dimensional images, anything that triggers a sexual thought and that isn’t real.

It just messes up my perceptions and my feelings. And it is doing the same to you but you may not be aware of it yet.

So now fortunately stage 3 happens…

Become much more attractive to women…and begin having a much better time with sex

This is when you get the fact that partner sex and masturbation are so different.

Partner sex becomes really fantastic again. And masturbation has lost its attraction.

Quite frankly, it can get to a point where you don’t masturbate at all.

Not because you are trying not to, but because it is so satisfying having this time with your penis in her vagina and soaking her up that it’s just not even interesting anymore to masturbate.

And the women all over become so much more attracted to you and start giving you signals everywhere.

flirty girl and guy

 

I’m nothing special in the looks department. And even I can’t go out without some woman giving me a signal, perhaps touching my shoulder at the restaurant like happened the other day. Or giving me a frank stare and tossing her hair.

It’s not like I’m anything incredible looking either. It’s just the power of normal male sexual energy.

Because today

Women aren’t used to basking in a man’s built up (normal) sexual energy

They are used to guys who spill their seed at every opportunity and guys who can’t get it up, and guys who are so porn-ified.

Of course there are plenty of virile men but the percentage today is way down.

So you stand out at this point (pun intended, LOL.) You really do. (Note to young guys: get with it, you have an edge in the looks department but older guys who recover are going to be eating your lunch.)

cute girl and guy meeting up

It’s amazing how much confidence you show at this point, even if you are normally somewhat inhibited, shy or reserved.

It doesn’t matter if shy, reserved or even timid is your outward personality.

Inside, your reptile brain is back into balance and it’s a naturally confident brain, and one that just wants to love and make love.

Your reptile brain is now completely confident and it puts out pheromones and confidence signals that women pick up on without your having to do anything, think anything or be anything but who you are. 

It’s at this point that I find 

Men are surprised to discover how confident they become

It’s striking, and this confidence isn’t about just being confident with women.

Here’s a huge secret of attraction and it doesn’t matter if it’s re-attracting your wife to wake her up sexually or landing a gorgeous girlfriend who really digs on you.

The secret is that women are attracted to men who are confident with other men.

That’s right. If you are confident in your dealings with other men, women will be all over you.

And what makes you confident with men and with women is that same male sexual energy.

confident man over woman sexual confidence shows

 

It surges in you and makes you feel like a total winner. And men get out of your way. They defer to you. They respect you even if you don’t say a word. You don’t have to say a word, they get these signals automatically.

This is what makes you more alpha if you want to call it that. And that attracts women and makes you even more alpha, in a virtuous circle.

There is a lot more to all this. But what you may want to do is head over to my From Dead Down There to Raging Sexual Confidence webinar which I’m able to give, thanks to my publisher allowing me to. Click to see what it’s all about.

And please leave a comment, question or concern here. Thank you

warmly

matt cook signature white background